We all await our special day. The day when we officially and emphatically say “YES” to the love of our life, with all the music, dancing, cheering, laughter, and all categories of fun.
But being married isn’t a piece of cake because such joy comes with its challenges. Nonetheless, a happy marriage is possible.
However, a good marriage doesn’t just happen. It isn’t just something you find, it is something you create. It isn’t just about finding the right mate, but being the right mate yourself.
It is about giving yourself fully to the cause – watering, weeding, and nurturing as you walk every step – feeling each other’s love, making adjustments, creating memories, and building a bond that could last forever. I’m sure you want to know how this is possible?
Here are some tips for a happy marriage to help you better understand the process;
1. Show Respect For Each Other
Relationships may be defined in different ways depending on who is involved, but to have a great relationship, there needs to be a high level of respect on the part of both partners.
It is one of the most important determiners of marital health and resilience – a major factor in upholding relationships.
By respect, we mean the way you treat or think about your spouse and to honor the differences you both have.
This means, as one of the tips for a happy marriage, you have to accept both their beauties and flaws, the bitter and sweet, and the good and bad.
It also means that you have to learn to talk to them politely and honor them both privately and publicly – don’t go running your mouth before others especially on intimate details about your spouse that only you are privileged to know.
It will lead to a mutual loss of respect that could affect the spark in your relationship. Learn How To Bring Back The Spark To Your Relationship here.
2. Display Your Love For Each Other
One of the most important tips for a happy marriage is to display your love for each other. Love is the feeling that makes every romantic relationship unique. But what is love without expression?
Expressing that love to your significant other is the fertilizer that makes the relationship bloom.
It is the behavior that will revitalize your relationship, such as; offering emotional and physical acts of affection, expressing tenderness, compassion, and sensitivity to your partner’s needs; sharing activities and interest; maintaining an honest exchange of personal thoughts and feelings, and so on.
However, to better help us understand the concept of love, Dr. Gary Chapman outlined 5 love languages that talk about the “primary” way people give and receive love.
In other words how people define the concept called “love”. They are – Words of Affirmation, Acts of Service, Receiving Gifts, Quality Time, and Physical Touch.
By Words of Affirmation we mean the power of spoken words – does your partner demand your opinion now and then for an outfit?
Do they seek your comment on how they handled that matter (even though it is obvious they got the attention of everyone else)? Do they ask your opinion about the soup they prepared (even when others compliment it)? Then you sure have a hint about the above love language.
Do they always ask for your help with this or that or perhaps you noticed them feeling more romantically attached to you whenever you clean the house, wash the car, do the dishes, take out the trash, go get groceries, etc. then, the Acts of Service might just be what works for them.
Do your lover feel like you’ve done the whole world for them when you present them with a gift (no matter how small) or repeatedly announces you to the world on how a loving partner you are, because you got them a snack, then Receiving Gifts might just be it!
If they always crave your undivided attention or always crave just the “me and you time” and none else, that could be their way of telling you that they feel more connected and in love with you when this “Quality Time” happens.
And if they always want to cuddle, hug, hold hands, kiss, peck, or do anything just to get that “Physical Touch” with you then you’ve got the answers!
All you need to do is to study and learn your partner’s way because only in these tips for a happy marriage can you communicate love and Stay Madly In Love.
3. Intentionally Communicate
This is an essential key when considering tips for a happy marriage. Because honestly, forthright communication becomes the gasoline in love’s engine, which is why there can’t be real, lasting love without it.
Couples who practice this skill talk about anything possible, home, career, aspirations, etc. They feel comfortable expressing their needs, fears, and ideas. Set boundaries, express care, fix problems, and even make love, which is why they are stronger together.
Having these real conversations (at least once a day) is enough to wipe away any form of misunderstanding, anger, and resentment in the relationship.
The person sharing can get any frustration or thought off his or her chest and the listener gets to know more about their partner, which in turn deepen the bond of trust and unity they share.
So, if you are considering tips for a happy marriage, then Improving Communication should be top of the list.
4. Show Gratitude To The Love Of Your Life
This Marriage Advice For Newlyweds is one of the elements of a successful marriage. It has a unique way of connecting couples because it is the single most powerful source of inspiration that they can both share and it can bring out the sweetness in them even more.
When we say gratitude, we mean, the act of sincerely acknowledging a partner’s did for the sole reason of thanking them.
It is universally an appreciative kind of love that helps people feel more positive emotions, relish good experiences, and deal with adversity.
To get this going, take time to honestly and spontaneously express your appreciation towards each other every day.
Acknowledge the contributions they make to the family expenses and even their contributions on the non–material emotional level.
Tell them how amazing they’ve been through all thick and thin. Sing their praise among friends and family, on your blog, or other platforms, and show how proud you are of them.
You could also leave gratitude in love notes, hide them so they will find them, try to be creative by presenting gratitude gifts.
Take time each night to write down three positive things your partner did that day – whether they said something nice, did something kind or shared generosity to someone else.
The key to enjoying these above methods or tips of a happy marriage is to say it loud and often. Learn How To Make Your Husband Feel Like A King Daily.
5. Do Fun Thing Together And Have Fun
Any successful relationship requires intentional quality time together; this is one of the useful tips of a marriage. This time means “couples’ sacred time.
Spending time at social events, time with family, and doing chores doesn’t count as sacred time. Instead, carve out special time to not only be intimate but also ensure that you continue to share new experiences together.
For example, you can take a walk together and hold hands (to nurture that calm effect), break out the measuring cups, and cookbook to spice things up in the kitchen (you can flour fight).
Settle in for a game moment and enjoy a little friendly competition – whether they be, monopoly, clue, or catchphrase.
Take a dance class, read a book together, etc. You could sometimes go for a weekend getaway (without prior planning), make it fun and sensual.
Buy tickets to see your favorite artist, just do anything that makes you happy and connect and leave people asking for the tips of a happy marriage.
6. Focus On Each Other’s Strength
There can indeed be times when all the spark in your relationship is brought low, with you seeing all the pronounced spots (flaws) of your partner here and there.
Your focus deviates from the positive notes of your sweetheart to their acts of wrongs (even when those wrongs are unintended). But to sustain this union, tips for a happy marriage must be applied.
This tip states that you redirect your focus on to the lovely qualities of your special one (those qualities that made you fall in love in the first place), and allocate each other duties where such qualities can be utilized.
For example, if you are better with numbers, don’t get angry when he/she misbalances the checkbook. Instead, make it your job to set the budget.
If their strength is cooking, they can manage meal planning instead. If you focus on amplifying what is right, you will also likely fix what’s wrong in the process. So stay positive and keep track of what your partner does well.
7. Show Maturity By Taking Responsibility For Your Actions
This is one of the major tips for a happy marriage that displays how well we are grown and ready to face life’s challenges. Conflict, especially in relationships, is inevitable, but they don’t have to be destructive.
When you argue with your significant other, the only way to begin transforming your problems into solutions is to take full responsibility for the parts you played; including anything you did or said, especially if it was hurtful, unthoughtful, or created adversity and then, apologize.
However, it is important to note that your partner might interrupt your apology by describing how much you have hurt them and what they are going through after your actions but try not to get defensive or point back at their errors.
Acknowledge their hurt and validate their feelings and proceed with your apology. You can go like this – it was wrong of me to have hurt you the way I did, I ask for your forgiveness.
If I could go back in time of correcting my wrongs, I’d be glad to do just that. I apologize once more and I hope this incident strengthens our love and relationship.
Offer a meaningful gesture of warmth, such as a hug or a kiss, and pledge to take action that is meaningful change.
When you do this, you will be able to connect with your partner in a mature, intimate way. One of the evergreen tips for a happy marriage is learning How To Stop Fighting In Your Relationship.
8. Have A Life Of Your Own
One of the rules for a successful marriage, is that you must first be happy with yourself, in order to be happy in a relationship.
In other words, you must have other sources of fulfillment first to enable the relationship to thrive. For instance, building a career for yourself as well as having a social life outside your relationship keeps you from getting bored and can help enrich the relationship between both of you.
Having these friends will enable you to have new experiences, broaden your interest and perspectives, and pursue passions that otherwise might fall dormant.
As you build a career, you become a boss and not static and that is cool. Your independence makes you more attractive and valued by your lover.
If you keep working on yourself, you’ll be able to achieve a balance with your sense of autonomy while also depending on each other, thereby creating room for your marriage to stay fresh and vital. This is one of the tips for a happy marriage that is often overlooked.
9. Develop A Heart Of Forgiveness
We all indeed make mistakes. Yes, every one of us (including you reading this) because we aren’t perfect. We are humans and that alone means we have flaws.
However, one of the worst ways to live your life is to be stuck in the past.
The thoughts of resentment, anger, and hatred produce all kinds of stress chemicals that will flood your body and make you sick, both physically and emotionally, and will dis-empower you if you continue to let these thoughts occupy space in your head.
But with forgiveness comes healing.
This is not to say that forgiveness is forgetting what took place, or condoning, or excusing the offense but a conscious decision and a practice of releasing those feelings of resentment or revenge even though the wrongdoer’s actions do not deserve it.
It is about extending mercy to the person who hurt you, showing pardon for the mistake or what they did to you, and finding your peace, while you allow new possibilities in the future because of the sincere remorse shown.
So stop touching those old wounds as long as the lessons have been learned and move on to a better phase of your marital life together.
10. Keep Intimacy Alive
One of the best tips for a healthy marriage is for partners to engage in activities that give room for real, profound connection – a closeness that brings both partners together in a powerful way, and that includes the act of making love. Lovemaking is an expression of love – a place where love blossoms.
It is a wonderful experience in which partners take turns pleasuring each other; looking at each other and at the same time realizing passion.
However, the most important thing is not to get entangled in doing the same old tricks and poses. Learn to keep it interesting by sending steamy text messages throughout the day to build anticipation of the main event.
Talk about what pleases you and add any fantasy role-playing, posture, or get some fun and intriguing toys.
If you are in the habit of having it with the lights out, keep them on. Do it in a different room, or a different place altogether, just do anything that works for you and keep it exciting. Learn How To Bring Back The Honeymoon Phase Of Your Relationship.
11. Don’t Ever Stop Going On Dates
Children, busy schedule, and apathy can all get in the way and lay a stronghold on us but simply setting aside a romantic evening regularly can rekindle the magic of a long-term relationship.
To enjoy your date, you can go to see a movie, or find a local chocolate shop and take turns trying the chocolates from assortment boxes and guessing the flavor. You can also get to a quaint local shop or a new place to eat.
Partake in karaoke, or do anything fun. When you date your husband or wife, you get to increase the number of shared memories and this increases the quality of your marriage. Here are 50 Unique Date Ideas To Try Out.
12. Set Your Priorities Right
With today’s hectic schedules, it’s easy to find your marriage at the bottom of the priority list. All these things (career, personal pursuit, etc.) can feel justified to you, even necessary.
Perhaps you are bucking for a promotion at work, or maybe you are a student working to earn a degree, that’s all good!
Yes, it’s important to set goals, get ahead at work, and learn new things, but what good will that promotion or degree do you, if you don’t have a special one to share it with?
Putting your partner first means his or her needs, feelings, and well-being takes priority over other people or things.
It means that you consider everything through the lens of the two of you as a couple and how your decisions and actions will impact your partner and your relationship going forward.
So, if you want to protect your relationship from being destroyed or damaged, stop cheating yourself and your partner (out of your long-term happiness), and strive to give your spouse the very best of yourself; not what’s leftover after you have given your best to everyone else.
13. Allow Compromise
With the way we (humans) are structured, no two people agree on everything, and that is just fine! It’s our differences that makes us unique anyway, but unlike unhealthy compromises where one person is repeatedly giving in to the other, healthy partners think beyond their own interests and consider the other person’s feelings, intentions, goals, and makes decisions by meeting each other halfway, when there are differences of opinions.
It means that each of them recognizes that they may not get their own way every time and that is okay! The simple act of putting themselves in each other’s shoes will help them reduce tension and maintain an open mind – to help them better understand their partner’s ideals.
And this simple act shows them how valuable their feelings are (actually, how valuable they are), moving the relationship forward at every phase.
14. Practice Commitment
One of the characteristics of a successful marriage is that they are committed. Commitment is a single word representing the sum total of loyalty and faith.
It is the state or quality of being dedicated to your relationship. The couple who practice this (commitment) in their romantic relationship is fixed on the marriage.
They don’t have wandering eyes either do they entertain any flirtatious gesture from others. They are faithful to their vows and would do anything possible to defend the relationship.
15. Being Realistic And Letting Go Of Fantasies
It is natural to want to have a perfect relationship but the danger is that sometimes this quest for perfection can confuse us into projecting unrealistic expectations onto our partner.
We fall victim to fairy tales with all the prince charming and snow white drama rolling in our heads, comparing how and what they did to how we should be treated in reality. But that’s not the right way to live!
All these thoughts keep you feeling frustrated, angered, anxious, and disappointed when you can’t get them. Only if you can learn to accept your partner as they are, can you experience a happy marriage.
Marriage can be quite an interesting institution. But for any relationship to work, both partners need to do whatever it takes to infuse these happy marriage tips into their relationship – Whether it is devoting their time, energy, resources, etc and make effort to building that desire home and place of comfort (marriage) where they can both feel each other’s love.
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