Not being freaky enough for our men is the main reason for frustration in the relationships – the constant battle of wondering what our man is doing to compensate for our shortcomings in bed.
You can’t help but begin to harbor the notion that this man is probably cheating on you and then you ask for things a woman can do to spice up the bedroom.
Most times it is the fear that ends up killing us, not even the realization that it is happening, our relationship begins to suffer because of the thoughts in our head.
Whether we like it or not, physical intimacy is one of the pillars of a healthy relationship, and making love is one of the main aspects of physical intimacy.
What this means, in general, is that once the physical intimacy level in your relation suffers, the whole relationship is bound to suffer at some point.
This leads us to the big question we have all been asking which is; how to be more active in bed as a woman. This because of the benefits to us first, to our man and then the benefits it puts forward in our relationship.
It is however a tricky subject – how to be active in bed as a lady because different things work for different people. It will be impossible to say that this is a straight line but no matter how bent this line may seem, it will surely be leading you and your partner to a happier and healthier relationship in and out of the bedroom.
Just in case you didn’t listen to the early morning news or read the papers, I would have to say it again, the bedroom is one of the most important rooms in the house; as a matter of fact, asides from the kitchen it is the most important room.
So, finding out how to be more active in bed as a woman will be one of the most amazing gifts you give to yourself, your partner, and your relationship.
However, this is different from looking up the meaning of the phrase better in bed, you cannot just read this article and magically expect to be an expert in the bedroom.
How to take the lead in bed as a woman has more to do with practicals than just reading the information we have gathered here.
Also, the room was not built in a day, so do not expect to become the Greek goddess of love overnight – a skill as beautiful as this would take time to master but with the information here, we are sure that the lovemaking session between you and your partner tonight will be twice as enjoyable as it used to be.
10 Answers To The Question ‘How To Be More Active In Bed As A Woman’
There are so many answers to this question and they cut across so many aspects and conditions. Some have to do with you, others have to do with the environment and a few will depend on your partner.
Some of the answers we have provided are purely emotional or psychological while the others are things that can be done in the physical but at the end of the day, they all point towards doing one thing and that is telling us how to be more confident in bed as a woman.
So, for the sake of your relationship health, here are 10 things a woman can do to spice up the bedroom;
1. Know Yourself
The first answer we would give if you ask us how to be more active in bed as a woman would be for you to know yourself and your body.
Once this is done then you can be invincible in the bedroom – to appreciate this more there are a few things you must first understand.
First is the fact that no two women have the same body biology or chemistry; some little distinct features separate them.
For example, the g-spot on every woman can not be found at the same position, some are closer to the exterior than some making it harder for some women to get aroused and easier for others, this is from a biology standpoint and is one of the reasons why the distance is always approximated in study materials.
Also, there is the argument about squirts and creams, if all women do both or stick to just one. No science is proving any of this and that is looking at things from the chemistry point of view.
This is why to know how to be more active in bed as a woman, you have to first know yourself and what makes you think. Self-pleasure is one method that we recommend in a quest to know yourself.
2. Prepare Yourself
The wise men of the world would say he whole fails to plan has already planned to fail and it is not like we believe them as factors like luck isn’t considered but we think there is some truth in that.
Preparation is everything and when we say this, we do not mean watching videos although we would get to that, when we talk about preparation, we are simply looking at your body.
There are things you do that will end up spicing up your bedroom life a whole lot. So, if you are asked how to be more active in bed as a woman, your response should for them to check what they eat and what they do.
There are some foods and fruits that would do you a lot of good in the bedroom and there are some that will hinder any sort of progress you are making.
Some of the foods, fruits, vegetables, and herbs you should be looking to have more of include ginkgo, ginseng, maca, red wine, chocolate, honey, strawberries, oysters, chili pepper, figs, potatoes, and of course bananas.
As a woman, some things you should avoid that may seem good according to popular belief includes Spanish fly, yohimbine, mad honey, the love stone aphrodisiac, etc.
You could also try getting enough sleep, checking your medications properly, reducing the stress levels, doing some exercises, yoga, etc.
3. The Start Is Key
Sometimes it is not something you do but the problem you are having is the things you fail or forget to do. We know that your earnest desire is to please your man and get him to climax but then it is important to note that the process is as good as the end.
This is why we always ask that you start well, that is how to be more active in bed as a lady. Yes, we know you want to rush into penetration because you think that is what he wants but then it is how about what happens before that.
Kiss properly, it may seem like nothing but kissing is one of the most important parts of making love. We have seen some men who believe that kissing is the most intimate thing that they can do with a woman, so imagine if you made that the best moment of intercourse for him.
Foreplay is important also, so improving your skills would meaning improving how good you are in bed, and believe us, this is how to be more active in bed as a woman.
4. The Bedroom Is No Library
And at such silence should not find its way into the room because once that happens, you are going to be having an unsatisfied partner sharing the room with you.
Make a lot of noise once you are making love to your man, that is how to be more active in bed as a woman. Moaning is one of the easiest ways to turn a guy on and it is a sure way to spice up things in the bedroom.
So be vocal about how he makes you feel, even if sometimes you have to exaggerate, as long as it is not overly dramatic and unbelievable.
Say his name in the most sensual way possible when next he is inside of you and watch how he has a more intense climax – this is how to take the lead in bed as a woman. Here are 11 Bedroom Habits You Should Adopt!
5. Communication Is Number One
Understanding and communication are the two golden pillars that help any relationship stay upright for as long as both parties would want.
Women must know what the needs of their men are because no two men have the same needs, they all want to be treated differently in bed and such communication is the only way to find out what your own man wants.
Also, your needs should come first – he should know what you want in bed. When you are satisfied, it is easier for you to satisfy your man so tell him what you want and how you want it.
You know your body now, so it makes everything easier. Then there is the issue of your fantasies that should not be ignored for any reason whatsoever. Know what your man dreams of and if it is achievable, make sure it is done for him.
Moments like that do not go unforgotten and also having your fantasies come to life is how to be more confident in bed as a woman, so communicate about everything in the bedroom and watch your bedroom life with your partner improve drastically.
6. Self-Confidence Always Wins
The most important thing is confidence when you get into the bedroom, sometimes it is not what you do that makes things in the bedroom, tick – sometimes it is how you do them and the best way to do them is with all the confidence you can muster.
So, when you get on the bed, you don’t turn out to be the shy type, you do everything you want to do with confidence, that is how to move in bed.
Keep the lights on when next you are together, men would rarely say these things but little things like this make them go crazy.
They want to see you in all your glory and with time keeping the lights on is how to be more confident in bed as a woman. Also, once in a while we suggest that you make the first move, the confidence can send a man to overdrive.
7. Visit The Prop Shop
Your strength alone will not carry you in the bedroom half of the time, so there is a need for help outside. It is not necessarily getting human help like bring in a third party because not everyone is crazy like that but there are other ways to get the help you seek.
Visit the prop shop and get all the things you need then go ahead to get the things that you want because they all will be useful when the time comes.
If you are looking for how to be more active in bed as a woman then one of our best bets would be role-playing when next you are in the bedroom.
Depending on how crazy you and your partner are, you could include a camera and capture the moment also. There are so many props in the adult store today, all you need to do is find out which of them works best for you and your partner and go for it.
8. Chill, Making Love Isn’t Such A Big Deal
The biggest issue you would have in the bedroom is the feeling that it is more than what it is. Overthinking has been known to be one of the killers of libido in both men and women. Check out 11 Biggest Mistakes Women Make In Bed.
So next time you are in the bedroom with your man, we suggest you relax and enjoy what is going on. Every moment matters, when you are making love, the connection is what makes everything better, so it is important that you focus on what is going on in the moment and push all other distractions aside.
Again, we will say it, because it can not be overemphasized, you must relax and take things one activity at a time. Most times we are thinking of how things will end even before they begin and that is one of the problems we face.
The most important thing is to focus on the now, forget about the climax and how the session would end, that is unimportant to you. If you are looking for how to be more active in bed as a woman, then relax and enjoy the moment.
9. Learn And Explore
You will not know everything especially when you communicate with your partner and find out their fantasies. What we suggest here is that you sit back and try to learn new things.
It is okay to admit when you are way over your head and seek help. You could try asking him exactly how he wants what he wants, he will always be the best teacher since these activities will be done together but there are other ways.
Adult films is another good place to learn although you must take into account that almost everything that is acted out there is scripted, so most of the reactions and scenarios are fake.
You could also do a how-to search on google or YouTube to find out how some things are done, for example, how to give a blowjob, etc. exploring is another way to spice things up in the bedroom, a lady asked once how to move in bed and the answer she got was ‘not in one direction.
It is important not to explore as many positions as your body allows you to, it all makes for better love-making.
10. Set The Mood
If he is the one buying you flowers and making sure he comes back home with your favorite snack just so you guys have an amazing night then at some point he will get tired of doing that.
So once in a while, you should be the one setting the mood, get him wanting you even before he returns home from work.
Send him sensual photos of you and make the caption even better, visit him during his lunch break and text him later that you forgot your underwear in his office. It is important to set the mood than when in the bedroom it is also important that you dress for the occasion, this is how to be more active in bed as a woman.
The bedroom remains the most important room for you and your partner asides from the kitchen and a lot of building in your relationship will be done in that room.
So, you must take the lead and make sure your man leaves happier and satisfied whenever you both go in. making him want you more reduces the chances of him wanting another woman, and what we have given here are steps too which these goals can be achieved.
So, get some more knowledge about the bedroom after communicating with him to know what he wants then the next step is being vocal and inviting all the help you can get. If the question is how to be more active in bed as a woman, this is how you go about it.
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