9 Bedtime Routines For Couples To Make Your Love Stronger

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bedtime rituals for couples

Bedtime is a sacred time, therefore it needs some bedtime routines for couples. It creates the time for you need just for the two of you to enjoy each other, talking, and showing your love abundantly. It’s such a moment filled with excitement.

In fact, think back to when you just got into the relationship. Bedtime was exciting, looked forward to, and special, right? Yeah! Fast forward to some years later, can you say the same?

The truth is that you may have unintentionally slipped into some bedtime habits that aren’t helping your relationship.

Sharing the right bedtime rituals for couples with your partner can be just what you need especially after your daily increasingly busy schedules.

These few quiet moments you spend with your partner at the end of each day may be what you need to make that difference – whether you’re trying to keep the spark alive in your relationship or you’re just trying to go to bed more relaxed and connected to your partner, it makes you both emotionally close and affectionate and at the same time improve your sleep hygiene.

To further improve this, here are some suggestions about bedtime routines for couples and things happy couples do before they go to sleep:


9 Bedtime Routines For Couples To Make Your Love Stronger

bedtime routines for couples


1. Have A Regular Routine Before Going To Bed

It is great to sync up your bedtime and hit the bed together. From brushing your teeth side-by-side, washing your face, drinking herbal tea, reading a book to whatever your preferred method is to wind down at night.

You probably need to clean up before bedtime anyway. Why not hop in the shower with your sweetheart and save a little water while you’re at it.

Following these bedtime routines for couples add fun to your relationship and gives your marriage that spark it needs with your smiles and laughter as its icing.

It is absolutely a fantastic way to de-stress at the end of the day and one of the must-do bedtime rituals for couples that I have with my spouse.


2. Bedtime Routines For Couples: They Go To Sleep At The Same Time

Many couples don’t see each other all day long and have a habit of going to bed at different times with one or the other staying up later to watch TV, finish up work, or take on a few last tasks of the day.

Truth be told, going to sleep at the same time is difficult to pull off when you’re a night owl and your partner is an early bird.

However, keeping separate bedtimes lead to greater disconnection and the feeling that each person is living a separate life, and you wouldn’t like that.

So, couples need to go to bed together as much as possible. If your bedtime doesn’t match that of your partner, it’s often a matter of choice. Try to find a common ground (bedtime) that suits you both.

Going to bed together is a conscious decision you can make to show each other that you choose togetherness rather than the slow drift of living separate lives which can happen so subtly.

Note that a healthy relationship means building a sense of connection and that requires being in the same place at the same time (bedtime). So if you aren’t together then, it probably means you aren’t together much at other times either.


3. Ditch Your Gadgets Before Going To Bed

Many people are add#cted to smartphones – so many, in fact, that it’s considered an epidemic. Smartphones and other devices have become the third wheel in many relationships, causing couples to feel they are competing with their spouse’s device for time and attention.

Examples occur when you pull out your phone to check the football scores, or you read a text while with him or her, you plug on to social media, scrolling, liking, commenting, email-checking, posting, and all whatnot; thereby, disconnecting you from real human relationships and emotional and physical intimacy.

Once you’ve made it into the bedroom, see it as a sanctuary for the two of you. If you have a TV in your bedroom, decide on a time when it goes off and stays off.

If you need an alarm to wake up in the morning, make sure that it’s in place, but all the rest can go.

The very presence of the phone or device suggests to the other person, ‘I am ready at any moment to opt-out of being here with you for something better or more interesting’. In other words, ‘you are less important than my device’.

Subsequently, you never fully engage with each other in a particularly meaningful way. Furthermore, using electronics before bed may impair your ability to use melatonin (the sleep hormone); thereby keeping your brain in an alert mood.

So for better sleep, you could put your phone away in another room. Maybe in the kitchen, bathroom, heck, even basement to charge overnight.

If you are worried that you may miss a call in case of an emergency, set it so that it only rings when certain people are calling, but still place it out of bed and out of reach, just in case you get tempted. Or better still, power off everything a few minutes before bed.

This will allow you to have more conversations happen easily and also allow yourself to feel more connected to your partner without interruption.

Ditching my phone before bedtime is one of the bedtime rituals for couples I incorporated early into my relationship and eventually marriage.


4. Give Each Other A Massage

Massage as one of the bedtime routines for couples is an extremely effective way to help reduce the physical stress from the body.

Maybe you had a rough day, maybe someone yelled at you, maybe your shoulders are sore from trying out a new kind of kick-boxing class that you did earlier in the days, or you probably worry about what needs to get done or haven’t done that day; whatever your reasons are for wanting to receive or give more touch, a long, slow massage can be the perfect way to truly relax your partner.

During this session, they will be almost instinctually driven to let go of the past and the future and turn their attention to the present moment.

It helps physiological changes in the brain that are associated with feelings of happiness.

This feeling is usually then followed by long periods of calm and can eventually lead to improved health and well-being; as it continues to calm both you and your partner consistently.

As a result, you can then find it helps aid sleep leaving you both feeling well-rested and rejuvenated. Massage can also help build anticipation, connecting you through touch to help intimacy and trust between you. Increased affection is one of the biggest benefits of a couple’s massage.


5. Have A Pillow Talk

Communication is one of the important factors when it comes to bedtime routines for couples as well as relationships.

It is a necessary element to understanding what is happening in your spouse’s life and key to an empathic partnership.

Talking about the day is lovely. You can make the bedroom your retreat; a place you can talk and support each other with your guards totally down.

This involves each partner taking turns at the role of either a speaker or a listener. It also involves expressing a “we against others attitude”.

The speaker shares their experience for the day/week, and the listener simply has to show curiosity without trying to problem-solve.

Tell each other about your highlights and lowlights. Share how things impacted and affected you.

Winding down for bed can also involve some playful-fun-conversations that reminds you of why you’re a couple.

Whether that involves your plans for the future, shared memories, or fun banter. You could induce how grateful you are about something they are, or that they do, or that they bring to your life. Or you could mention how grateful you are about something that they did on that specific day. The choice is yours.

Gratitude exercises (especially at night) make you feel all warm and fuzzy.  And it reminds you that, ‘oh yeah, my significant other is adorable, amazing and sweet’.

No matter what, just talk. This will help end the day on a positive note and make you feel better. It also has a positive influence on your overall mood, as all the stress and worries that you may have been carrying with you through the day starts fading away.

Pillow talking is one of the things happy couples do before they go to sleep.


6. Make Time To Cuddle

Is there a more calming way to unwind than cuddling? Cuddling is a love language on its own.

Whether you are spooning all night long or just for a few minutes triggers your body to release chemicals that help you bond with your partner and feel downright blissful.

Research suggests that sleeping close and cuddling increases oxytocin (the ‘love’ hormone) which helps to lower stress hormones; thereby, making you feel calmer and encourages feelings of safety and security – leading to uninterrupted sleep.

It is also a great way to start foreplay that leads to more fun time, which is a win-win for both of you.


7. Ultimate Bedtime Routines For Couples: Make Love!

Lovemaking as one of the bedtime routines for couples is a great way to have a good sleep. It also creates the kind of connection with your partner that long-term, committed relationships thrive on.

It goes a long way to make sure the two of you have your needs met, as it allows you to be passionate, to show affection, and feeling more satisfied.

You don’t have to worry about being late for appointments, it’s just you and your partner all night long.

However, it doesn’t have to be a marathon session all the time, a quick#e will suffice some days; not to worry, it is the closeness, the affection, the bonding, the pleasurable release, that really helps to solidify a love affair.

Bedtime sweet acts of love can be such a great way to reaffirm your love for each other.


8. Daily Bedtime Routines For Couples: Say A Prayer Together!

Bedtime Routines For Couples

Praying together as one of the bedtime routines for couples is just as important as the strength of any relationship.

A wise person once said that couples who pray together, stay together. And this can be true.

Expressing your longing to pray with and for your spouse communicates your love for God and your spouse.

It humbles you and allows you to be vulnerable even as you share with God and your spouse what things worry you, tempts you, or what you need to figure out. And allows you to show forgiveness and grace towards each other.

This vulnerability can strengthen the love and affection you feel for one another; it can also deepen your relationship for years to come.

Also, praying together enables you to look back on your day and count your blessings.

It allows you to stop and think about all the things that happened to you during the day, and take those moments to feel gratitude and appreciation; even as it creates a place where you can fight for your relationship together when difficult times comes.


9. Say ‘I Love You’

Revealing our loving heart to our partner is immeasurably valuable for communication and couples flourishing.

Oftentimes, we think that our significant other must magically know this important bit of information that we love them. After all, we would not have chosen them if we didn’t think about the world of the other person, right?

However, it’s time to ‘frequently’ vocalize these three beautiful words that never get old during these bedtime routines for couples.

When you tell your spouse ‘I love you’; what you are really saying is, ‘I think you are a good person and I love being with you’.

It shows that you value your spouse and the relationship as it reminds you both of how much you mean to each other; making it clearer that you are happy in the relationship. And this ends up being your very last thought before your mind slips into a night’s worth of restful sleep.

It always feels good to fall asleep knowing you are loved and cared for.


Yippee! There you have it, 9 Bedtime Routines For Couples To Make Your Love Stronger. I hope you find it useful in your quest for building a stronger and healthier relationship.

Check out How To Be A Better Wife, 15 Ways To Spark Your Relationship and 20 Tips For Newlyweds for more resources to better your relationship.


Final Words On Bedtime Routines For Couples

Hey there, thanks for reading to this point. You are unique! All these cues about bedtime routines for couples are to say that it is vital to close out your day with a combination of physical and emotional intimacy.

Imitating and ritualizing these bedtime rituals for couples will offer you and your spouse opportunities for communication, closeness, and togetherness; which will, in turn, improve your relationship and make it healthier by each day.

Keep spreading love until I come your way again, Ciao!


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Author: Lover Sphere

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  • we have done all of it except the last one….i’ve told him ” i love you” in too many ways like in other language etc but i dont know why i can’t say it like I LOVE YOU…..

  • I love this ! Thanks for sharing. We definitely need to work on prayers (together) at night before bed. The Lord placed us together so that’s important to us as well.