Marriage is a partnership that requires effort, understanding, and constant nurturing. However, certain habits, often developed over time, can slowly damage the relationship if left unchecked.
Whether it’s a lack of communication, neglecting emotional or physical needs, or letting small issues build up, these behaviors can strain even the strongest marriages. It’s important to recognize and address these habits before they take a toll on your connection.
In this blog post, we’ll explore 10 bad habits that can undermine a marriage and offer insights on how to avoid them. Understanding these pitfalls can help couples strengthen their bond and maintain a healthy, lasting relationship.
10 Bad Habits That Can Destroy Your Marriage
Marriage is a beautiful journey, but sometimes, we can get stuck in a routine, not realizing how some habits can slowly destroy what we’ve worked so hard to build. If you’re like me, you want to see your relationship grow stronger, not fade away. So, let’s talk about the bad habits that can destroy marriage, and trust me, it’s not just about the big issues; it’s the little things we often overlook.
1. Not Communicating Openly With Your Partner
Communication is EVERYTHING in a relationship. It’s the bridge that connects two people, and without it, you’re living on separate islands.
Building a strong marriage is hard when you’re holding back your thoughts. I’ve seen couples fall apart simply because they were afraid to say what was on their minds. Imagine one person bottles up their frustrations, hoping their partner will “get it,” while the other remains clueless. Eventually, all that pent-up emotion erupts—not in a good way.
The truth is, your partner isn’t a mind reader. If you’re feeling overwhelmed, confused, or hurt, talk about it. Open communication is the lifeline of any healthy marriage. You can set aside 10 minutes daily to share your highs and lows. This practice can break down walls and build intimacy over time.
Instead of brushing issues under the rug, try effective communication exercises for couples, like active listening or “I feel” statements. It’s amazing how much progress you can make when both of you feel heard. Bad habits that destroy marriage thrive in silence, but transparency can be your saving grace.
Remember, the goal isn’t to “win” the conversation but to stay connected. If you want to protect your marriage, don’t let silence create a gap where love should be.
2. Ignoring Your Partner’s Feelings And Needs
You know that feeling when you’re trying to talk to your partner, but it’s like they’re a million miles away? Or when you express a need, and it just goes in one ear and out the other? Yeah, it’s not a good feeling.
Ignoring your partner’s feelings and needs is like telling them they don’t matter, and that’s a recipe for disaster. It’s one of those toxic habits that can destroy a marriage faster than anything else by creating a chasm of disconnect between two people who are supposed to be each other’s biggest supporters.
We all have needs, whether it’s feeling loved and appreciated, needing some alone time, or wanting help with the dishes. When those needs are constantly ignored, resentment builds up, and that’s never a good thing.
To meet your partner’s needs, start seeing your relationship as a two-way street. You need to give as much as you take, and that includes emotional support and understanding. When your partner’s feeling down, be there to lend an ear and offer a shoulder to cry on. When they express a need, make an effort to meet it.
Meeting your spouse’s needs is one of the little ways to strengthen your marriage every day. So, tune in to your partner. Pay attention to what they’re saying and not saying. Sometimes, the most important communication is nonverbal. A hug, a gentle touch, and a knowing look can speak volumes.
3. Constantly Criticizing Your Partner
No one likes to feel like they’re under a microscope. Constant criticism erodes self-esteem and chips away at the love you’ve built. Sure, you might think you’re “helping” by pointing out flaws, but imagine how you’d feel if every little mistake you made was magnified.
I’ve learned that love thrives in a supportive environment, not one filled with harsh words. Instead of focusing on the negative or saying some hurtful things to your partner, try to catch them doing something right. Offer words of encouragement, appreciate their efforts, and build them up. Use some compliments men love to hear, like “I’m proud of you” or “You’re doing your best.”
There’s always room for growth in a marriage, but growth comes from support, not judgment. If you want your marriage to thrive, focus on the strengths and build on those.
If you’re tempted to criticize, ask yourself: Is this worth the emotional cost? Try replacing critical remarks with intimate habits of couples who are deeply connected, like offering praise or expressing gratitude.
4. Not Spending Quality Time Together
When was the last time you really spent time with your partner without distractions? I’m not talking about sitting next to each other on the couch, glued to your phones. I mean real, intentional time — like a walk together or sharing a meal where you’re fully present.
Without quality time, even the best relationships can slip into monotony. And as life gets busy, it’s easy for couples to forget just how important this is. If you’re not careful, these bad habits that destroy marriage start to pile up, and the distance between you and your partner grows.
Do you miss those times when your conversations flowed seamlessly, and you couldn’t wait to share your day? Getting back to those simple moments can bring that spark back. Prioritize that one-on-one time, whether it’s date night or just a quick walk after dinner. Make it a habit to cherish the small moments and reconnect often.
5. Keeping Secrets From Each Other
Trust is the backbone of any healthy marriage. Without it, the whole union starts to crumble.
Keeping secrets from your partner might seem harmless at first—maybe it’s something you think they wouldn’t understand or get upset about—but it’s one of the bad habits that destroy marriage without a doubt.
A little white lie here, a hidden conversation there, and soon you’re holding things back that should be shared. And while you might think you’re protecting them, you’re pushing them away.
So, instead of keeping things to yourself, be open. Share what’s on your mind, even if it feels uncomfortable. That’s the glue that holds your bond strong. Don’t let secrecy turn into a barrier between you and your partner.
Vulnerability builds trust. Start with openness and honesty if you want to know how to get the spark back in a broken relationship. You’ll be surprised how much closer it brings you and how much better your relationship can be. A transparent marriage is a thriving one.
6. Flirting Around With The Opposite S#x
This is a tough conversation, but it’s necessary.
Flirting might seem harmless at first—maybe it’s just a few playful comments or innocent attention. But here’s the thing: even minor fl#rtations can plant seeds of doubt in your partner’s mind.
When you flirt with someone outside of your relationship, you’re signaling to your partner that something might be missing. Maybe it’s a lack of attention at home or something deeper. The truth is, these bad habits that can ruin your marriage are subtle, and once trust starts to fray, it’s hard to repair.
You might think it’s harmless fun, but ask yourself: Would you like it if your partner did the same thing? If not, then don’t do it to your spouse. Focus on keeping your relationship strong by finding ways to spice up your marriage and rekindle the honeymoon phase.
If you’re tempted to flirt for attention, stop and remind yourself why you’re with the person you love — and how special that connection is.
7. Taking Your Partner For Granted
Here’s a big issue I’ve seen in my relationships and others: taking your partner for granted.
It’s easy to fall into this bad habit that can ruin a marriage because, let’s face it, you know they’re there for you. But things start to slip when you stop appreciating the little things — like them making dinner, taking care of errands, or just being there when you need them.
A simple “thank you” or a random act of kindness can go a long way. Don’t wait until it’s too late to start noticing what your partner does for you. Show your love, even in the small moments.
Appreciating your spouse is one of the simplest ways to make them feel special every single day.
8. Avoiding Conflict Instead Of Resolving It
One of the worst habits that will destroy your marriage is when you’re avoiding conflict rather than tackling it head-on. Every time we choose silence over communication, we’re creating a small fracture in the foundation of our relationship. You see, healthy relationships need honest conversations, even tough ones. That’s how we grow.
It’s not always easy. It’s tempting to think that it’ll be fine if we pretend everything is fine. But that’s rarely the case. I’ve been there myself. Avoiding the tough talks only makes things worse. It took me a while to realize that keeping my thoughts to myself wasn’t protecting the relationship—it was slowly eroding it. But once I started facing those tough conversations with honesty and vulnerability, things began to change for the better.
9. Constantly Comparing Your Partner To Others
You know that feeling when you’re scrolling through Instagram and see a couple doing something sweet, and suddenly, you feel like your relationship is missing something? It happens to all of us. We all get caught up in comparing ourselves to others at some point. But here’s the thing: comparing your partner to others is a slippery slope that only leads to dissatisfaction, and it’s one of the things women do that turn men off.
Bad habits that destroy marriage are often rooted in expectations that aren’t realistic or fair. No one’s relationship is perfect, and social media often paints a picture of something that’s not the whole story.
Comparing your partner to someone else, whether it’s a friend’s husband or a celebrity couple, creates unnecessary pressure. It takes the joy out of appreciating the unique qualities that make your relationship special.
If you’re doing this, try to shift your mindset. Celebrate the unique qualities that make your spouse to be who he is. We all want to feel loved and accepted. Your partner is your partner for a reason. Stop looking around and start looking at the person right in front of you.
10. Bringing Up Past Mistakes During Arguments
We all face a temptation during an argument: bringing up the past. I get it—when you’re hurt, you want to make your partner feel the weight of your pain, but dragging up old mistakes doesn’t help anyone. Instead, it makes the situation even messier.
Every time you remind him of something he’s already apologized for, you reopen wounds that should’ve been healed. This is another one of those bad habits that destroy marriages. It makes forgiveness almost impossible.
Let go of the past. If it’s truly been forgiven, don’t use it as amm#nition in future fights. Remind yourself that a healthy marriage isn’t about scoring points—it’s about finding solutions and moving forward together. Whenever you feel tempted to bring up old wounds, redirect the conversation back to the current issue calmly and kindly.
How To Deal With Bad Habits In Marriage
When it comes to bad habits in marriage, it’s important to face them head-on together. These habits can sneak into your relationship without realizing it, causing tension and disconnection. But don’t worry, you can work through them! Here are some easy ways to deal with bad habits in marriage and get back on track.
Talk Openly With Your Partner About The Habits That Are Affecting Your Relationship
Sometimes, we let bad habits slide, thinking they’ll just go away on their own. But if something’s bothering you, it’s important to discuss it.
Being open and honest with your partner about how their actions make you feel can clear the air and make things better. You just have to be calm and kind when you bring it up so it doesn’t feel like an attack.
Approach The Problem As A Couple, Not As Individuals
When it comes to fixing bad habits, you’re in this together. If one person tries to handle it alone, it’s easy for the other to feel blamed or left out. By facing the problem as a couple, you’re showing your partner that you’re both invested in making things better for the relationship. Think of it as a team effort, not a solo mission.
Agree On Boundaries That Both Partners Can Respect And What Behaviors Are Unacceptable
Setting boundaries in your marriage is like creating a safe space for both of you. Sit down and agree on what’s okay and what’s not—this helps prevent misunderstandings.
When both partners know and respect each other’s limits, it’s easier to avoid behaviors that hurt the relationship. This will help you both feel respected and loved in the long run.
By facing these issues together, you can strengthen your marriage and build a more loving, understanding relationship.
Final Take On Bad Habits That Can Destroy Your Marriage
Now that we’ve covered the bad habits that destroy marriage, it’s time to take action. Open up your communication, make sure you’re in tune with each other’s feelings, and stop the cycle of criticism. A thriving marriage doesn’t happen by accident—it happens when both partners are committed to building and supporting each other. If you’re ready to protect your relationship, start today.
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