Fewer things get a woman worked up more than when she’s doubting her man’s love for her. Her health—be it emotional, mental, and even physical— is being affected negatively because she’s wondering if the love of her life thinks the same about her or he’s just pretending to love her. Jeez, no one wants to be in those miserable shoes.
Most women would do anything at all to not accept the truth that stares at them right in the face. But in the later run, we have no choice but to take the bulls by the horns and make some hard choices. And that’s to check for signs he doesn’t love you.
Most of the time, these signs he no longer loves you or signs he pretends to love you are glaring but we might be too blinded by our fantasy or alternate reality to see them.
Today, I’m going to give you ten signs he doesn’t love you or signs he is no longer interested in you. These signs would help you know if your man is just pretending to love you.
1. Deep Conversation Is A No-Go Area
Deep conversations being a no-go area is one of the blatant signs he doesn’t love you. When your man’s mood changes from a hundred to zero instantly whenever you dare to wade into the deeper waters of conversations is one way to know that things are no longer as they used to be in your relationship or as they’re supposed to be.
You want to discuss having children, he puts on the TV and watches sports. You want to talk about marriage and he abruptly mentions a business proposal he’d forgotten at the workplace.
You want to talk about meeting his family for the first time and it seems as if what you said was only a prompt for him to slide into the dream world. It’s only a man who cares little about your feelings would do that to you.
These scenarios and more are just a glaring depiction of signs he doesn’t love you. A man truly in love with you would not do that to you, trust me.
2. You Are His Favorite Person Only When He Needs A Favor
This is one of the signs he never loved you that really hurts. No woman likes to realize that she was just being used by the person she loved and thought loved her too.
I remember being in this miserable situation in a past relationship. When my ex wanted dinner, I was the one he called.
When he wanted to have a business idea fleshed out, he instantly thought of me. When he needed a loan, I was on speed dial. But that was just it.
He only thought of me when he needed me to do something for him. He had a lot of uses for me but didn’t really care for me.
If you feel that this is the same way it goes in your relationship, then dear, even though it’s hard to accept and swallow, it’s time to realize the truth; that it’s one of the signs he no longer loves you. It could even be that he never even loved you in the first place.
3. He Stopped Saying I Love You
Someone once said that if a man loves you, you’d know for sure. And why is that so? Because a man who loves you will tell you so all the time without hesitation.
Whether he is an introvert or extrovert or even an ambivert, a man who loves his woman would want her to be reassured of that every time. And he does that not only with his actions, but his words too.
So if you can count on one hand how many times your man has said “I love you” in the last six months or more and still have some fingers left to scroll through this post, then dear, it’s a sign that either he never loved you or signs he is not in love with you.
If you ask him if he loves you, and then he hesitates before saying or he says clearly that he is not sure, then there is a high chance that you are correct when you assume that he doesn’t love you.
4. He’s Not Protective Of You
A guy who loves you would certainly protect you when the need arises. It’s in their DNA. They feel more like themselves when they are standing up for their woman when a perilous situation arises.
A friend of mine went to a party with another friend and was too drunk to drive home. Her boyfriend ranted a bit about what she did (like a parent) but did what he was supposed to do without being asked—he went to pick her and her friend up and took them home. He did that because he didn’t want anything to happen to the woman he loves.
That part in movies where a man tries to put his woman behind him in the face of danger is not just fictional and it’s not because he thinks she is a baby. It’s because he instinctively does that to the woman he loves.
So if your man does not care two pennies about your safety and well-being, if he does not help you out when you are stuck in trouble, then honey, that is a big fat sign that the man in your life is not feeling the same way you do.
5. He Does Not Profess You As His Woman When With His Friends
My Dad once told my sisters and me that when a man loves you, the whole world is going to know.
And that’s because men naturally are territorial; They proclaim to the world that they have a treasure that belongs to them and that they dare anyone to come close.
I remember one of my husband’s buddies and how he was before he got married. Let’s call this friend, Josh. Josh was a playboy.
He changed women faster than he did his underwear. And when we teased him about it, he said it was just all about the fun. He never makes a special reference to any one of them.
Until he brought a woman, not too gorgeous like the previous women but beautiful still, to our home for Thanksgiving dinner.
I remember Josh introducing her with a smile that rivaled the sun as ‘this is my woman; the love of my life’.
That was when I first suspected that this relationship was unlike the other and it was something deeper. Since men can be dense sometimes, my husband teased him later about having another catch.
You can imagine my husband’s shock when he got an invitation letter to Josh’s wedding about six months later.
So that’s it with men. When they love you, you know because of how they treat you around those they also care about.
Any man who tries to act cool by disrespecting you in the presence of his friends does not love you. Even when discussing passionate subjects like baseball or soccer with his friends, if you are around, a man in love with you will use little but important gestures to let you know that you are on his mind.
But when he doesn’t love you, he would rather acknowledge a piece of furniture than pay attention to you. If your man doesn’t acknowledge you as his woman, then that’s one of the red flag signs he doesn’t love you.
6. He Lies To You
Your man lying to you is one of the signs he doesn’t love you. A man in love with you would want to earn your trust and respect. And what better way to do that than to tell you the truth even when it’s hard to do so?
But when your man lies to you even if it’s not necessary at all, then it’s one of the signs he pretends to love you.
When he gives you tales of lies when you ask about his past or something equally important, then it means he doesn’t want you to get to know him well. For if he was in love with you, he wouldn’t do that.
7. He Doesn’t Respect You
Another one of the important signs he doesn’t love you is when he has no regard for you.
If your man is in love with you, he would consider you as his partner.
And that means considering your opinions and feelings when making important decisions especially if it involves the two of you.
He would consider you worthy to make decisions and take actions on your own. But if he doesn’t love you, then it will feel as if you have no say in the relationship.
You will continue to doubt yourself and wonder always why you are not measuring up to your man’s standards.
This makes me remember my younger sister’s friend that had started wondering if she was actually the same person that had graduated from med school because of how her ex had made her feel. I’m thankful she quickly realized what was going on and did the needful.
So, if your man does not respect you and consider you as an individual capable enough to have excellent opinions and make decisions, then it’s among the signs he no longer loves you or never did. Check out these 15 Shocking signs of disrespect if you’re in doubt of being disrespected.
8. He Is The Chairman Of The Board Of Criticism
This is not only one of the signs he doesn’t love you but also indicates that you are in a toxic relationship.
It’s a fast way to tear down a woman’s self-esteem and confidence. A man that is not in love with you would rather look for faults that you have so that he can negatively criticize you every minute. If he never sees and compliments the good things you do, then he probably does not love you.
9. He Doesn’t Support Your Dreams
Anyone, not just your man, that loves you would vote for the things that give you happiness. A man who loves and cherishes you would go the extra mile to support you achieve your dreams.
That’s because seeing you being fulfilled makes him also fulfilled. If your man does contrary to this, then it’s among the signs he doesn’t love you.
Remember that past relationship I talked about earlier? The guy in question was negligent and callous every time I talked about the visions I had for myself.
He’s the reason I didn’t venture into the writing world early enough because it didn’t fit into the picture of what he wanted his girlfriend to be.
So if it’s the same with you, then it’s one of the signs he only pretends to love you.
10. You Feel Unhappy With Him Most Times
One of the bold in-your-face signs that he doesn’t love you is that you are happier with other people than with your partner. It could even be that you are slowly falling out of love with him because the love you have for him is no longer a source of joy but a burden.
When you are tired of him apologizing and then repeating the same mistakes over and over again; when all you have from him is hot and cold attention, then it is probably among the signs he doesn’t love you.
A man who doesn’t love you wouldn’t lose a wink of sleep on how you feel so miserable around him. That’s because you don’t matter much to him.
Probably, you have checked out these signs and wished you hadn’t read them because they are going to make you make some hard choices.
It’s not going to be easy, I will tell you. It has never been easy for any woman who has gone through this arduous situation of doubting the love that the man in her life has for her.
Maybe you are considering leaving things the way they are because you fear to face the storms that would come if something was to change. You don’t know what to do when he no longer loves you.
But like Oscar (Fingal O’Flahertie Wills) Wilde, an Irish Playwright said,
“There are moments when one has to choose between living one’s own life fully, entirely, completely or dragging out some false, shallow, degrading existence that the world in its hypocrisy demands.”
It’s up to you to make that choice to make things better for yourself because you deserve to be loved and cherished by a man you call your own.
If you feel there is the hope of reviving your man’s interest in you, oh please do (You can check out How To Stay Madly In Love With Your Spouse, How to bring back the spark in your relationship) and if not, it’s up to you to seek love elsewhere.
Whatever you do, let this saying from Nelson Mandela resonate in your head: “may your choices reflect your hope and not your fears.”
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